The start of the summer holidays

I have been looking forward to the summer holidays - I don't work so I don't have to worry about childcare, I really hate the clock-watching round the school run and I like having my children at home.

However, I would be lying if I said it didn't feel a little bit daunting now they have arrived. Days spent at home are not always very successful for us so my default has always been to get everyone out once or twice a day. That seems a lot more challenging this year with a small baby thrown into the mix who is nowhere near any kind of feeding and napping routine. On his sleepy days when he is happy to nap in the buggy for a three hour stretch it should be fine. But when he decides he is having a feeding day it gets a lot harder to keep an eye on the other three when I'm stuck under a hungry baby. I got stuck feeding in the park the other day and had to across with E still attached when A managed to get his foot wedged in something designed for much older children!

The other three have their challenges as well, some of which may pass once everyone settles into the holidays. W is very shouty, fairly aggressive towards his brothers and has started being surprisingly rude at times. I think he is just testing it out but I have been finding it hard not to react. T, my usually cheery child, is crying at all sorts of things he never normally cries at (often caused by W's admittedly hideous behaviour towards him). And 3 days in to the ripe old age of 2, A's favourite word has already changed from yes to no. Suddenly it is taking a lot more time to coax and cajole him into doing things he previously would have done without question.

Added to that, my plan to get on top of the house and the toys before the holidays start hasn't happened. The boys' ability to create mess at the moment is incredible. I thought that by starting with a blank canvas each day it might be easier to keep on top of but I don't have enough of my evenings back yet to make it happen. Half the contents of the study is still piled up in the dining room after we shifted it all out to have the carpet replaced a couple of weeks ago and there is a permanent explosion of craft supplies across the dining table. I think my husband is going to be notable by his absence this summer as things have ramped up at work so the childcare could be fairly relentless.

But having got all that off my chest, I am quietly optimistic that we will settle into a new routine and all will be ok. We have nothing planned for the first few days when hopefully they can get some of their tiredness and shouting out their system. I have belatedly started my grid of activity ideas (prompted by someone sharing theirs on Instagram) to stave off some of the calls of 'what can we do?'. And without the rigidity of school and nursery timings hopefully the baby can get into a bit of a routine that we can plan around.

PS It has taken me a week to get this up on my blog as the childcare has been fairly relentless but we have had a good time so far and the shouting has lessened a little - I think we're moving in the right direction.